A.K.A 18 things every 18-year-old needs to hear…
Gratitude
Happy Birthday to me!!!! I turned 19 this year, and now I can reveal my Pisces heart (Aries moon, and Taurus rising…) so I think that will give readers so much context into who I am and why I think how I do! I’m so grateful for everything that I’ve experienced and learnt, and readers of my blog are honestly a huge reason why I am so blessed.
The list is split up onto 4 categories: Studying, Lifestyle, Love, and Faith.
Studying
1. You don’t need to wake up at 6am to start revising (unless you really want to)
Studying can start at any time of the day – yes, even awkward times like 11:23 or 4:44, it doesn’t always have to be at nice whole times like 9:00 or 2:30. If you’re one minute past the time you said you would start, just start.
I also had to get over my studying ‘fomo’ when I would have conversations with people during GCSE’s who would tell me their early morning revision plans that made me feel bad about my own timetabling
2. This corresponds to lesson #1 above, but working smarter, not harder, is so important.
Other people’s steps to success are going to be different to yours, so don’t feel the need to copy 100% of their strategy if you don’t think their plan will help you. Working smarter not harder can be as simple as realising that actually, you might like to dedicate 2 hours to going over a past-paper, rather than re-reading the textbook. There are so many other ways to study smarter for better grades with less effort, but feel free to follow what you feels works best for you
3. there is so much more to life than only grades
It’s something that is really important to me, but it actually shouldn’t come above your mental health, relationships with family or friends. It’s okay to not spend all day everyday revising, and instead be more present and intentional with the people around you.4.
4. instead, just try your best – even if someone else is better
It’s okay to not be the best in the class- when I was taking GCSE’s and A Levels I would secretly get upset if I didn’t have the highest mark in an exam that I thought I had worked hard on. Now, I don’t see it as a failure as long as I still did my best and learnt a lot from studying for it
5. Aim for the stars
My grandma always said to me ‘aim for the stars and if you miss you’ll reach the clouds, but if you aim for the clouds you’ll reach the roots’. Essentially, from this I take to always try your hardest as the rewards will be greater than if you didn’t. This can apply to many things in life, one of them being your study goals. For example, if you’re applying to University soon (for undergraduate or postgraduate), it’s worth considering using one of your options to apply ‘for the stars’ and send an application to a dream school of yours.
In my case, I actually made two ‘ambitious’ applications to the London School of Economics (LSE), and Durham University. And luckily for me In this scenario, it paid off and I received offers to attend both! If you’re not a little bit ambitious you will never know where you could be and the opportunities available to you.
Lifestyle
6. have flexible life plans
Having a 5-year plan is good, but having a 1 and 10-year plan is better. Let’s face it, at 16 a 5-year plan is a bit pointless if you’ve just finished year 11 exams and have no idea if you like your A level combination or if you’ll apply to university (where or what courses) or what friendship group you’ll have… its hard to predict what kind of goals you’ll have in this short-but-also-too-long period of time. However, it could be fun just to say something crazy like what you hope your life will look like in 10 years (where will you have travelled to, what skills will you have, etc). More realistically – and actionable – a 1-year plan is far better to create the life you want to live- there are so many goal-setting videos available.
A yearly plan can be more targeted to each phase of your life and is more actionable as you can devise several sub-goals to reach a larger master goal (‘passing this years exam’ becomes ‘not skipping any classes, spend enough time revising, and take onboard feedback’).
7. The 72-hour spending rule
If there’s one thing I heard last year that has stuck with me since- to wait 72 hours to purchase something after thinking about it. I always have a shopping list written in my notes app of things I think of during the day, and often when I look back at it later I’m glad I didn’t buy something because I already had something similar already, or it was a completely unnecessary purchase.
This rule also makes me so much more intentional with my purchases so I only buy what I really need.
8.If you fail to prepare, prepare to fail
I’m a chronic planner, so if something isn’t in my calendar it’s more than likely not happening or worse- I’m unprepared for it. The most recent example I have to show of it was not planning what I would pack for my girls’ holiday to Greece. I forgot to pack a hat and there is genuinely nothing worse than intense heat on your face- not to mention how un-sunsafe that was! I also forgot to bring a calculator to a maths exam one time. Always work out what you need to bring/do at least the day before it needs.
9. start making meaningful connections
Make friends and also connections. Networking isn’t something I’d really recommend to every teenager, but if you know a particular area you’re interested in there’s no harm in reaching out- even if it doesn’t serve you a purpose (it’s nice to be nice!) Maybe you have a friend whos working on their own baking business, or trying to start being a nail artist- support them! It’s also a good idea to try and make friends with people you maybe typically wouldn’t have before.
10. check on those you haven’t spoken to for a while
Sometimes you have to be the person to reach out to an old friend first. It might seem a bit awkward at first but if this is a friendship you want to maintain, it’s worth taking the step to reach out if you haven’t spoken in a while. Maybe they’ve been really busy and didn’t mean to become distant or maybe they really need a friend this time, or maybe it was a complete accident. Either way, it doesn’t hurt to send a message just in case.
11. being different
It’s okay not to dress like everyone else- and it’s also okay to also dress like everyone else. If you like what’s trending, wear it. But if you don’t that’s also fine and you shouldn’t force yourself to be like everyone else and follow trends just because. It’s also just better for the planet to re-style your old clothes, and trends change so fast nowadays it’s more sensible to curate your own ‘capsule wardrobe’ than check-out carts every couple of weeks.
12. learn a new skill
With so many articles, videos, online courses, blogs written with the aim to help you learn something, there has never been a better time to learn a new skill (or even multiple at a time). You could take this to the extreme and learn a new language, a sport, or an online skill like coding, or you could learn something else that interests you more like practising nail art, baking, or how to make videos.
13. just start
Start that social media page, business, etc. you might feel scared of judgement but if I had never started taking social media seriously or launched this blog I would never have had the opportunities I’ve had. If you have an idea or a bit of inspiration- act on it. Do the research and put together something you’ll be proud of in the future.
14. lift each other up
Sometimes it’s hard, but really work on not gossiping or talking about people behind their backs! I’m also just working on having a nicer tone and being more supportive of people around me
15. faith will help, not hinder
To me, even a quick prayer the night before a tough day I have planned (exams, meetings, etc) helps me stay relaxed and trust that everything will fall into place for me- think ‘lucky girl syndrome’ but with a little backup from God
Love
16. It should be easy
… And long distance can be achievable. In simple terms, you shouldn’t have to beg for the bare minimum and conversations should flow naturally! Also thrown in here is the fact that long distance doesn’t have to be as scary as it sounds and it might actually work a lot better than you think. Having your own space can really help you get your own independence and sense of self, whilst having the comfort of knowing you have someone who likes you back.
17. time
It’s okay to spend time by yourself. I’m always looking for fun things to do with my friends, family, or boyfriend, but really sometimes I’m genuinely happier spending time reading or on a walk with a podcast by myself.
18. If he likes you he’ll let you study first, then hang out. Always.
If he likes you he’ll let you study first, then hang out. Anyone who deliberately comes in between you and your goals, you should really evaluate.
The person you’re seeing should always try and lift you up and help you achieve your goals, even if that means not seeing each other for a little while longer.